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Loyalty (Wafa)

I’m a newbie to the world of story writing, preferred to write stories in my own native language; Urdu. I’m writing below story in Urdu, but just to give you all a glimpse of what it is, I write it down in English. It’s just a part of a story not the complete story. I’ll be very happy if you could give your comments on it whether good or bad are acceptable. And finally, if you have any suggestions for me to improve my capabilities, then please let me know.

Story

“Hi Myra” Ali places his phone aside after sending a text to the girl whom he loves. Wandering into thoughts, waiting for the reply and started to think that why he fall in love. The pain is unbearable; emotions are high and all he wanted now to be with Myra. Message tone beeps once and goes silent; Ali took his phone outrageously to see Myra reply.

“Hi” she replied to Ali message, her mood is totally off due to a bad day. “How are you? I have called you since afternoon and even drop some messages too, but you did not reply. Were you busy or there is some problem? You know I got worried about you!” Ali replied without thinking that she might have a bad day, but he shows his concern about her through the message.

“Yeah, I was not busy. Was at university and that teacher you know, she spoils my mood and that is why I did not talk to anybody. I made a huge effort to complete my thesis and she didn’t try to see what’s inside, and she said to me make a better one.” She spent a whole day in a rage and did not share why her mood is totally off. “Hmm, hold on. I will call you in a minute! OK. Then we will sort out the issue.” Ali was in a rush and worried that her love is mad, angry, and sad and that she spent her whole day in a bad mood. Ali went to the roof to talk to Myra. Phones ringing, Myra picked up the phone. “Hello” in a very low voice, her heart broken over what happened to her in university, “Don’t tell me to be cool and calm. It’s totally biased decision she took today, you don’t know what she did to me today.” Before Ali reply to her, she burst out like a strong volcano. Shocked, half mouth open, he never sees her like that before.

The story goes on, keep your finger crossed and see what could be the end.

 
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Posted by on May 16, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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